I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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