For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
