can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
