I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
