I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
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