I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
porn star boner night. come get it.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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