Where is the hickey?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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