I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
