omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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