Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
