Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I have aggressive nipples.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
