Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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