that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize