ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
