What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
