There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
