I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize