Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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