we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
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