your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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