True but thats because hes a fetus.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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