I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
