i think i have herpe
just one?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
