I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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