My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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