I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
