Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Randomize
