I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
areolas are like halos for boobs.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
