did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize