I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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