I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize