don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize