My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
