i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize