PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
