I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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