That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
