You were right. It hurts to walk today.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
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