i jhust puked up my retainher.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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