worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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