who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
