My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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