i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize