is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
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