we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize