what if every blade of grass was a penis?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i came on her dog
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
You ate ashes out of my bong
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
