We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
