what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
