quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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