So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize