well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
