I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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